Friday, December 14, 2007

And Now...the Latest Episode of GM's Against Brian Burke

This week on GM'S AGAINST BRIAN BURKE! Sharks General Manager Doug Wilson plots against his Western Conference rival in his underground lair. Let's take a listen...

Doug Wilson: Alright boys, welcome to the third annual meeting of the Legion of GM's Against Brian Burke. Let's recap our past accomplishments, shall we? This summer, we almost convinced Scott Niedermeyer to retire, but someone wasn't able to finish the job....Lou.

Lou Lamoriello: Sorry Doug. I let you down.

Doug Wilson: Yes you did, Sweet Lou. You let us all down here in the Legion. That's the last time I take a salary dump off your hands....Last month, we convinced Brian that waiving Breezy was a good idea. Nice work everyone.

Wayne Gretzky: Thank you so much guys. To show my gratitude, I've got a great tip on the Patriots/Jets game tomorrow from my wife...

Doug Wilson: Hold it. How the #%&@ did you get in here Gretzky? You lost your GM license a long time ago. Now go fix your hair and pretend to coach that team of yours. Okay, GM's...this week we have to find a way to completely screw over Brian Burke as he tries to dump salary to get Niedermeyer back. Any ideas?

Kevin Lowe: I'll offer five years, 55 million for Corey Perry!

Doug Wilson: Put a sock in it Lowe. Next?

John Ferguson, Jr: Please stop booing me. I'm doing the best I can. Does anyone want Andrew Raycroft? Anyone?

Doug Wilson: Stop begging John. Have some dignity. Come on boys! Doesn't anyone have an aging veteran, an unknown prospect and a bag of shit to offer?

John Davidson: How about Doug Weight, Michal Birner and a 7th round pick for All-Star center Andy McDonald?

Doug Wilson: Brilliant!

JFJ: Damn it! Does anyone want Mark Bell?

Doug Wilson: This meeting of the Legion of GM's Against Brian Burke is adjourned....Good work everyone.

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